If nothing else, the new action flick "The Punisher" offers truth in advertising.
The ad for it claims, "The Punishment Begins April 16."
And boy, does it. About 1 hour, 59 minutes worth of punishment.
Based on a popular Marvel comic book that's been around, on and off, since the '70s, "The Punisher" stars Thomas Jane as ace FBI agent Frank Castle, who, in the prologue, makes one last spectacular bust before retiring. Unfortunately, the son of Tampa criminal kingpin Howard Saint (John Travolta) is a casualty, and the elder Saint vows revenge.
He gets it with a mass slaughter at the Castle family luau, which leaves bodies draped over the fruit plate. Frank himself is pumped full of bullets and blown up but somehow survives. Nursed back to health by a handy witch doctor, he sets out to Kill Howard.
Castle has no super powers, so he must depend on his training and his wits -- which is hard to do in a movie as dimwitted as this.
Jane, whose muscles ripple like a thoroughbred headed to the post, has his shirt off within the first 10 minutes. One way to sit through the rest of the movie is to try to figure out whether the star has his shirt off more than he has it on. As for his acting, well, it's a lot less compelling than the shirt issue.
Travolta is capable of terrific on-screen villainy -- remember "Face/Off" with Nicolas Cage? But here he's more like the preening, over-the-top meanie he played in "Swordfish," a movie arguably as awful as "Gigli."
When Frank leaves to do some kick-butt punishing, the witch doctor says, "Go with God," and Castle snarls back, "God's gonna sit this one out."
You should, too.
After his wife and family are killed, G-Man Frank Castle takes it upon himself to rid America of crime by acting as judge, jury and executioner. Based on the Marvel Comics hero.
